Rest Well My Lads
by raydelmundo1
Summary: After the BOFA Balin and the others search frantically for missing comrades and are forced to face the bitter end of their quest… (SPOILER)
1. Chapter 1

**Title: **Rest Well My Lads

**Disclaimer: **I don't own any of it I'm just borrowing

**Summary: **After the BOFA Balin and the others search frantically for missing comrades and are forced to face the bitter end of their quest…

**Author's Note: **Hello fellow readers and writers! This is my first excursion into the brilliant world of J.R.R Tolkien, I've been reading his stuff for ages and some of the fanfiction as well but I have never written for this fandom. I love the books and I love the movies so I figured I'd give it a go. I was inspired to write this story by a wonderfully heart-breaking drawing I saw on tumbler. I don't remember the artists name but I'd still like to give credit where credit is due. From that beautiful drawing this story sprung, I'm not sure if I will keep it an oneshot or add to it…I hope you enjoy and reviews, critiques, and comments are always welcome!

**TA 2941**

As Balin continued to survey the carnage about him someone called to him as they approached. As he turned to see who it was he could still make out the familiar shape of the floppy hat even in the fading light.

When Bofur finally reached him he seemed slightly out of breath, but Balin couldn't blame him. It had been a long day, and the night would be even longer.

"Balin, they found Bilbo. They're taking him to see Thorin. We've also found Ori and Bifur, they're banged up alright but they'll recover." He reported to the elderly dwarf when he finally caught his breath.

Balin gave him a small smile. "I'm glad to hear it, it gives me hope…"

At his response Bofur's answering smile fell.

"So you haven't seen or heard from them yet? Thorin keeps asking after them and we don't know what to tell him."

Balin shook his head, "I don't want to tell him anything until we know for certain ourselves. Beorn said he last saw them in this area when he bore back Thorin and that they still stood. How is Thorin?"

Bofur sighed and removed his hat. He fiddled with it for a moment before he replied; "Gandalf and the Elven healers have done all they can. They managed to make him as comfortable as possible but they say he will no… not last the night." He cleared his throat as he averted his eyes.

Balin closed his eyes and lowered his head, he had known all along but having his worst fears confirmed was not easy to hear. He suddenly felt every one of his 178 years weighing down on him. He would be there with him before the end he promised himself, but first he had to do this for his friend. He needed to find his boys.

Before he could reply to Bofur he heard a cry go up, the voice was as familiar as his own and the raw emotion within it was enough to send his heart plummeting to the ground with the dead. Looking around in the direction he heard the cry he finally spotted his brother's familiar form kneeling over something.

Without a word he ran as fast as his weary legs would carry him towards his brother. He could hear Bofur running behind him.

Just before he reached Dwalin he stopped so suddenly that Bofur almost ran into him. He watched as the robust form of his brother shook with silent sobs. If he had any doubts as to what Dwalin had discovered that sight alone was enough to put them to rest.

Dwalin had cared for and helped train the boys since they had been wee dwarflings, loved them as much as he did and Mahal knew how much he loved those boys. Dwalin would react in this manner for one reason and one reason alone.

He started slightly when he felt Bofur's hand land lightly on his shoulder. He nodded his thanks at the small comfort and gathering what was left of his composure he began to move forward once more. When he finally reached Dwalin he saw what had reduced his ever strong brother to such a state. To put it simply it broke him as well.

There at his feet were the two Princes of Erebor, the hope and future of their people, his reckless, wild, joyous lads lay cold and motionless upon the ground. He felt the terrible grief he had been keeping at bay begin to bubble up from somewhere deep within him. He soon found himself kneeling by his brother their shared anguish streaming down their faces as they leaned into one another seeking solace and strength.

Balin noted that even in death the brothers would not be parted. They lay side by side Fili curled protectively around his little brother, one hand tangled in the brown locks that reminded them so much of Thorins' and the other resting limply in his brothers.

Had it not been for Kili's sightless gaze fixed on the heavens or the sinister arrows that protruded from the youth's chest Balin could almost pretend that he had come to check on the lads when he would take care of them as children to insure they slept only to find them in similar positions.

But this brought back a myriad of memories too painful to deal with for the old dwarf, a time of scraped knees and frolicking games, bedtime stories and soothing songs to chase away nighttime terrors.

A choked sob from behind him drew his attention and he watched as Bofur made his way around the two grieving brothers and knelt down by Kili. With a shaking hand he reached out and gently drew his hand down upon the boy's eyes. He let his touch linger before withdrawing it once more, having done what he had intended.

Drawing his hand across his own face in an attempt to wipe away his tears Bofur looked up at them.

"We should get them back, it is getting late… I do not wish to leave them… among this filth." He said in a quiet broken whisper.

Dwalin cleared his throat and mimicked Bofur earlier movement. "Ay, you are right we have lingered here too long. Let us bear them back." He replied gruffly, his voice still choked with emotion.

Bofur looked uncertainly at the brothers than at Kili.

"Should we remove the arrows first…?"

Balin shook his head in reply, "Nay leave them be, it sounds foolish but I wish not to cause him more damage. We shall let Oin or one of the healers see to them."

At this both dwarves nodded in agreement.

Without another word Dwalin reached down and carefully disentangled Fili's hand from his brother's hair. As he gently lifted Fili into his embrace Balin heard his brother's quiet sob as the boy's head shifted and came to rest on his shoulder. That sight too much to bear he turned to look as Bofur bent down to retrieve his charge.

That image was no easier to take than the last. As Bofur and Dwalin came to stand before him he reached out and placed one hand on Kili's brow and the other on Fili's. Closing his eyes briefly and offering up a silent prayer he let his hands fall slowly from their resting place. Feeling as if his heart had been replaced by all the stone in Erebor he turned and lead the slow procession back. His sorrows it seemed to him were only beginning, how was he to tell Thorin?


	2. Chapter 2

**Title: **Rest Well My Lads

**Disclaimer: **I don't own any of it I'm just borrowing

**Summary: **After the BOFA Balin and the others search frantically for missing comrades and are forced to face the bitter end of their quest…

**Author's Note: **Hello again fellow readers and writers! Well I'm back seeing as I've decided to continue this story a little more at least. I just want to thank everyone who has read my story and especially those of you who have favorited and are following the story. Here is another chapter for you all. I'm not too sure about it I feel like it didn't quite come out the way I wanted or planned but I shall leave it up to you to decide. I hope you enjoy and as always reviews, critiques, and comments are always welcome!

**TA 2867 (Flashback)**

Balin sighed tiredly as he stood up to go look in on the boys. He had sent them to their room a few minutes ago to sleep. At first it had been quiet and he had hoped that they would fall directly to sleep but after a moment their hushed giggles and a steady thumping of something being hit had reached his ears.

It shouldn't have surprised him those lads were never still and always seemed to have an inexhaustible source of energy.

As he opened the door to their room he was met with a sight that made the corners of his mouth turn up. So engrossed were the two dwarflings with their play that they failed to realize who stood at their door watching them.

It appeared as if they had decided that it was the perfect time for a pillow fight, as they took turns trading blows with their weapons of choice. A particularly good hit was often followed by a small cry of triumph from the wielder and the answering giggle from the victim. Balin watched them a moment, content to indulge the young ones with their play.

His smile widened as he noted that Fili would often leave himself open for attack and when it was his turn to retaliate his blows were soft and gentle. Of course little Kili at three years old had no clue as to what his brother did, but it did not lesson the sentiment.

Suddenly with a small cry evidently meant to be a fierce battle cry Kili launched himself at his brother who had not been expecting the attack. Both boys fell back on to the bed, a tangle of clothes, hair and limbs. After recovering Fili smiled up at his brother and flipped him on his back. Having successfully pinned him he began to tickle his little brother's mercilessly.

"You little sneak you will pay for it now!" he said to the boy in amusement.

Kili desperately struggled to squirm away from his brother without much success. His breathless giggles mingling with those of his elder. "No… Fili stop… I suwender…" he managed to squeeze out between his laughter.

Finally deciding to intervene Balin schooled his features and cleared his throat.

Immediately both boys stilled and as one turned to look at him. Their expressions of practiced innocence mirroring each other so perfectly, it took Balin all he had not to laugh.

"If I remember correctly I sent both of you to bed some time ago, would either of you care to explain to me why I find that this is not the case?" he asked slowly looking at each boy in turn.

Fili at least has the decency to look repentant but Kili had no such qualms. From where he lay still trapped beneath his brother he managed to fold his little arms across his chest and look crossly back at Balin.

The look he gave the old dwarf reminded Balin so much of Thorin that he couldn't help the small smile that made its way onto his own face.

"We wasn't sleepy yet Bawin! My eyes didn't want to close!" Kili explained as if that was the most obvious answer in the world.

Balin sighed and walked over to the bed.

"Well I suppose I will just have to give you more lessons and chores tomorrow so when night falls again your eyes will be too tired to do anything but close." He responded seriously taking in both of their reactions.

Fili's eyes widened in alarm as he moved off his brother and gently nudged him to stay silent.

"No Balin please don't we promise we'll go to sleep now, Kili doesn't know what he's saying he's lying." Fili pleaded looking imploringly at Balin.

Before Balin could reply Kili's outraged cry broke the silence. "I isn't lying Fili is! I'm not sleepy I won't go asleep!" he responded looking accusingly at his brother his eyes shining dangerously.

At this Fili's own ire rose as he frowned at his little brother. "Don't be such a baby Kili; you're going to make things worse! Stop whining and go to sleep!"

This, to Balin's dismay, is too much for the young boy to bear. Genuinely hurt by his brother's words and tone Kili moved away from Fili and moved towards Balin. Turning large tear filled eyes up to the older dwarf he extended his arms to him.

Without thinking Balin reached down to pick up the small child. Immediately Kili hid his head in Balin's shoulder.

"I want Ma and Unca Torin!" came his muffled cry.

Balin began to rub soothing circles on Kili's back in an attempt to calm the boy down. He glanced down to see the concern and guilt within Fili's expression as he looked up at the two. He smiled gently down at the boy in attempt to reassure him as he made his way over to the rocking chair Bofur had made Dis shortly after Kili was born.

When he sat down he rearranged his hold on Kili and motioned for Fili to join them. As soon as he had Fili settled against him as well he began to speak.

"I know you lads miss your mother and uncle, but they will be back soon I promise. When they come back I'm sure they'll have stories to tell you and you can tell them of everything you've learned and done since they've been gone. Once they get back it'll be as if they never left you'll see. Besides am I really all that terrible that you wish to be rid of me so soon?" he asked teasingly in attempts to lighten the mood.

At this both Fili and Kili shook their heads. "When Momma and Unca Torin goes away we like it when yous comes to stay wit us Balin." Kili replied while his brother nodded in agreement. Balin smiled and gently stroked the boy's hair.

"Well I'm glad to hear it; I also like staying here with you boys you keep me young." At his response both boys giggled having heard the opposite from Balin on several occasions.

"How about I tell you guys a story and then you can go to sleep, does that sound fair?"

Both boys nodded and beamed up at him, they were never ones to turn down a good story.

Balin stood up and led the boys back to their bed. Fili climbed up first and turned to help his brother clamber up as well. Once both lads were more or less settled Balin drew up a chair and seated himself at their bedside.

Looking at both of them he settled more comfortably into his seat. "Hmm… what story shall I tell…" he wondered out loud to the amusement of both boys.

Suddenly Fili spoke up surprising the older dwarf, "Tell us a story about Erebor!"

Balin frowned slightly, he knew this was a touchy subject within this particular household and he had only ever mentioned it once or twice in his lessons. "What exactly about Erebor is it that you wish to hear?" he asked cautiously.

Fili averted his eyes but answered him none the less. "I heard Ma, Uncle Thorin and Mister Dwalin talking about it one day. They just seemed so sad about it and Ma sounded a little angry but I just wanted to know why…"

Sighing Balin shook his head, "I think that's a question best left for your Uncle and Mother to answer but I'll tell you this. Erebor is part of our past, it shapes our present and it will be a major factor in our future. Erebor is our history it is a part of us. Some dwarves are affected by it in different ways; the memory and thought of it can bring us great joy, sadness, anger or hope. It all depends on the individual and their reasons." He told them trying to make it as easy for them to understand as possible.

As he looked at the boys he saw a sliver of understanding in Fili's pensive gaze but Kili he could tell had understood very little of what he had said. Once again looking at him Fili asked: "And what does Erebor make you feel Balin?"

"A great many things laddie, but ever if it brings me sadness I turn my thoughts to things that bring me joy and hope." He answered him honestly if a little evasively.

Suddenly it was Kili's turn to surprise him. Looking at him intently he asked: "If yous home is gone why is yous happy, I be sad if I have no home."

At this Balin chuckled softly, "Because a home is much more than just a place where you keep your things and sleep at night my dear boy. Besides there are things and people that give me hope that though my home is gone it is not yet lost and I may return there once more. It's something you will come to realize and understand on your own as you get older and maybe then you can see why I have hope." He replied looking fondly at both boys.

"I would like to go with you when you go back to Erebor." Fili said to him while Kili nodded his head in agreement.

Balin smiled, "I'm sure you will young ones. Now, how about I tell you a story about a time Dwalin and I got lost in the lower hall of Erebor?"

Both boys nodded enthusiastically and turned their full attention to Balin as he began.

* * *

Balin had gotten half way through the story when he noticed both boys were finally asleep. Kili had moved so that he was tucked securely at his brother side, his little arm draped over Fili's chest. Fili had one of his hands resting over Kili's that lay on his chest, while his other hand was tangled in Kili's messy locks.

The sight brought a smile to the older dwarfs face as he quietly stood up and pulled the blankets over the boys. He tucked them in carefully making sure to leave the covers firmly tucked in below their chins.

He bent over them and gently placed his hands on both their brows offering a silent prayer.

"Good night Princes of Erebor, may you rest well my lads." He whispered softly before removing his hands and moving towards the door. With one last look at the peacefully sleeping dwarflings Balin turned and closed the door, hope and love filling his heart and easing his burdens.

_(**End Flashback)**_

* * *

**TA 2941**

With a sharp jolt Balin came back to himself as he stumbled over something in his path. He had not realized how long he had traveled down the paths of his memories and he knew not why that particular memory had been stirred. But stirred it had been and as he continued to think on it, it only brought more bitter tears and laments.

They were nearly at camp so with an enormous effort Balin schooled his features and made his way closer to the light of the torches, ever followed by Bofur and Dwalin and their burdens.


End file.
